The Completely Useless Mod: A Lapis Lazuli Machine Gun in Minecraft
Minecraft mods can transform your blocky world into a realm of magic, technology, or terrifying monsters. Then there are mods that exist purely to make you laugh—or scratch your head in confusion. The Completely Useless Mod falls squarely into that second category. True to its name, it adds something so absurd, so impractical, that you cannot help but admire the sheer audacity. What is this groundbreaking addition? A fully automatic M249 light machine gun crafted entirely from lapis lazuli. Yes, you read that correctly.
What Exactly Does This Mod Add?
Once installed, the Completely Useless Mod introduces a single new item: the Lapis Lazuli M249. It looks like a real-world squad automatic weapon, but its body shimmers with the deep blue of one of Minecraft’s most decorative resources. You can hold it, aim it, and even fire it—though the results are anything but lethal. Instead of bullets, the gun spews a harmless stream of blue particles, or in some versions, tiny lapis lazuli shards that bounce off mobs without dealing any damage. The firing sound is a satisfying mechanical rattle, but the only thing it destroys is your stockpile of blue dye.
The crafting recipe is equally ridiculous. To build this useless masterpiece, you typically need three blocks of lapis lazuli arranged in a horizontal line, two sticks for the grip and stock, and perhaps a redstone dust to simulate a trigger mechanism. Considering that a single lapis block costs nine lapis lazuli items, you are spending 27 precious blue gems on a weapon that cannot even kill a chicken. That is the joke, and the mod embraces it fully.
Why Is It So Useless?
The mod’s creator made no attempt to hide its purpose. The title alone warns you. But let us break down the specific ways this addition fails to be practical:
- Zero damage output. Mobs and players remain completely unharmed, no matter how long you hold down the trigger.
- Absurd material cost. Lapis lazuli is better spent on enchanting or decorating; here it becomes a glorified noisemaker.
- No special abilities. It does not mine blocks, light up areas, or provide any buff. It just exists.
- Inventory clutter. The gun takes up a hotbar slot that could hold a sword, pickaxe, or even a stack of steak.
- No compatibility with other mods. You cannot enchant it, repair it, or upgrade it. It is a dead-end item.
In short, the Completely Useless Mod is a textbook example of a joke mod—a playful creation designed to poke fun at the very concept of adding overpowered weapons to Minecraft.
The Story Behind the Mod
This mod was built using MCreator, a popular tool that lets anyone design Minecraft mods without writing a single line of code. MCreator’s drag-and-drop interface has spawned thousands of mods, from simple block additions to complex dimension overhauls. The Completely Useless Mod is part of the EZ Resources Pack, a collection of lightweight, often humorous mods that prioritize fun over function. The pack’s philosophy seems to be: why not turn lapis lazuli into a machine gun? The answer, of course, is that there is no good reason—and that is exactly why it exists.
Installing Useless Fun
Getting this mod into your game is straightforward, especially if you use a modern launcher that streamlines the process. For players who enjoy experimenting with quirky mods, the foxygame.net launcher provides a convenient, flexible way to manage your Minecraft experience. Its built-in mod browser lets you discover and install creations like the Completely Useless Mod directly from the menu, eliminating the need to manually drag files into folders. Of course, you can also find the mod on standard community platforms, but having a launcher that handles version compatibility and mod loading automatically makes the whole ordeal feel less, well, useless. Once installed, the lapis lazuli M249 will appear in your creative inventory or can be crafted in survival mode, ready to waste your resources in style.
The Charm of Joke Mods in Minecraft
Minecraft’s modding community has always had a soft spot for the absurd. From mods that turn creepers into walking disco balls to ones that replace all sounds with cat meows, these projects remind us that games are meant to be fun, not just efficient. The Completely Useless Mod fits right in. It does not try to balance gameplay or add deep mechanics; it simply asks, “What if?” and delivers a blue machine gun with a straight face. Sharing a laugh with friends on a server while someone unloads a full magazine of lapis particles into a zombie is a memory that a perfectly balanced weapon mod could never create.
Moreover, joke mods often serve as entry points for new modders.